If you decide someday to stop this little game that you are playin' I'm gonna tell you all the things my heart's been a-dyin' to be sayin' Just like a ghost you've been a-hauntin' my dreams So I'll propose... on Halloween Love is kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you
Found this yesterday. I had never heard it before, it sounds cool and is oddly romantic for Halloween.
We had three trick or treaters last night and 2 Jehvoah’s Witnesses earlier in the day, which is kind of funny.
You See Halloween as Fun |
 You’re a friendly person, but not the life of the party. You like making someone else’s day – and you’ll dress up if you think of a really fun costume.You often feel invisible when you’re in public. And it’s a shame, because you’re really quite a character. Your inner child is stubborn and a bit bossy. Your fears are irrational and varied. It’s hard to predict what you may be afraid of on any given day. You’re logical, rational, and not easily effected. Not a lot scares you… especially when it comes to the paranormal. You are picky and high maintenance. If you wear a Halloween costume, it’s only when you really feel like it. And it has to be perfect. |
I get to check off another item on my MA To-do list. The thesis proposal as been accepted! I am very happy and relieved that it is done and I can move on to the thesis…which is started. I am already a couple of pages in. It is a bit overwhelming to say the least, and I can be distracted from it easily especially by Greek. It would be easier if the Greek was done. But it is only until Christmas. In the winter I will have only the thesis and my GA responsibilities.
I think I am coming down with a cold. That sucks.
I had my meeting with E&.S yesterday. It went much better then I expected, but I go prepared for it to be completely horrible. It was one of the more positive experiences I have had with them over the last few years. We had a good, pleasant conversation about where I am and where I see myself. They listened and nothing was turned into a confrontation. Since my candidacy is on hold must of the conversation was about what I have been doing over the last year and how I see my call to ministry. I was honest and told that I do see myself in some form of ministry, I just need to figure out if it will happen later rather then sooner. I explained my position on that and it was well received. The conference personnel minister was there and she was helpful in explaining possible scenarios.
In the end, my candidacy (on hold) has been extended for another year. During this coming year I need to do some serious thinking and make some major decisions about how I am to proceed. I meet with the committee again next fall and they will be expecting a decision form me, then they decide whether they support it or not.
The high points of the conversation was that I have come to the point where I as thinking more about my happiness and what is necessary for that, ministry is definitely part of that, but the timing of when it should become happen is up in the air. I am convinced that it will happen when the time is right. The committee liked that and we had a conservation around the option of ending my candidacy and restarting when I am more settled in my life. I am finishing my degree next summer and there are a couple of options of how I can proceed, either more school or work. Or I can return to the process and return to a theological program. With that option there are some concerns, financial and time, I am running out of time in the process which can only go on for 10 years then I would have to start over. So my decision is around this, do I return to the process and possibly not finish it in the time period (which is possible considering the various things that can cause delays) or to I step back, let my candidacy end next year and live in the real world for a few years and return when I am more settled and have more life experience. They said that both would be possible and has been done before, with no problems. So I have a lot of thinking to do.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
- Marianne Williamson
The career fair at school was yesterday. It was very good, there was plenty of exhibits, although a lot of them were looking for engineers and nurses. I was happy to find that there are some opportunities out there with an Arts background. Mostly research and HR positions. The main employers that I had luck with was the university, provincial government, and the federal government. One conversation was interesting, the job that I would be good for is something I would never of thought of….it’s in Ottawa through. So I have to seriously think about how far I will be willing to move. I have no issues with going anywhere on the East coast, and I think Ottawa would be nice. I picked up a lot of information that I have to look though which I will do this weekend.
I was relieved that it went well, especially since I was sick on Tuesday with a migraine. Not fun!
I have a lot of BIG things to think about, and since it is already October…time is going to pass quickly.
All the talk of grammar in Greek class made me think of this, particularly the part about the prepositions 
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 2 Cor. 4:8-9
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jer. 29:11
I will lead the blind by ways they have not known,
along unfamiliar paths I will guide them;
I will turn the darkness into light before them
and make the rough places smooth.
These are the things I will do;
I will not forsake them. Isaiah 42:16
I got a letter from the E&.S committee telling me about my meeting in two weeks. This after a phone call. I guess they are really going to make sure that they inform me in every way possible. It is slightly annoying. I have been thinking about it a little bit. I guess it is going to be like any other interview and I might need a bible character or story that think mirrors my experience. I can’t remember what I said last time and I can’t think of anything that fits now. Hopefully some inspiration comes over the next couple of weeks. The verses above are standing out as possibilities…I know, not stories but they are from the bible, so it should work.
I guess I should know more about the direction I am heading in, since I am nearly half way through my 2 years. But I have no idea what my future with the church will be. I know one of my problems was articulated wonderfully in the sermon at church last week. Rev. B was talking about how ministers treat other people, and fellow ministers, which can be not good. Minsters despite their knowledge of the bible, and the basics of Christianity seem to have trouble treating their colleagues with dignity, compassion or respect. This is not always the case, but it happens frequently. I have experienced it myself. I am not liberal enough, I want to get married… a lot of little things that really shouldn’t matter, or differences that should be celebrated became reasons to be excluded or looked down upon. I don’t want to become that. But even how, because I am taking a different path, I am treated differently but clergy people who are supposed to be friends. Because I haven’t been ordained yet, or am even sure that is what I truly want, then they needn’t waste time by talking, reaching out, checking in … anything. They act like they are better then me…they are not! I may not be ordained, but I can be a good to another human being. My problem with ministry, is that I will become pretentious, thinking I am better then others, more spiritual then the laity, and so busy being “concerned” about humanity to be concerned about people. All that negates the goodness of following a calling into the church, I don’ t think that is what God would want in the church. It bugs me. I may not have gotten ordained in the four years that were prescribed, I may never, BUT I don’t deserve to be treated like a second class person. If someone could be my friend, then being ordained, (or my not being ordained) shouldn’t change that. Ok…It REALLY bugs me.
I have a lot of things to figure out…goes with the last year of school. Thankfully there is a career fair this coming week at school. Hopefully that will be helpful and provide some ideas or options that will make me feel more comfortable. I would like to have some thoughts on the future for this meeting
I am very busy with school. The Semester is already in full swing and I am pretty much constantly busy. I have Greek class four days a week and that plus the prep for the class takes a lot of time. The thesis proposal is also keeping me busy and I hope to have it finished in the very near future. Also my tasks as grad assistant adds to the busyness at times. I am only required to work four hours a week but that is only an average sometimes it will be less sometimes more. I will be putting a lot of time into assistant when midterms begin. I am enjoying the semester so far and am doing well in Greek. I have already gotten marks and I am thrilled to get 98% and 96% on my first assignment and quiz respectively. I am loving everything,
I have a meeting with the E&.S committee in October. This is the meeting that they wanted in April. I would rather do anything else, especially it is during my break. But it must be done. I am trying ti remain calm about it and not get all twitchy…we’ll see how that goes
I went back to school this week. I am excited to be starting my last year of school. The semester is going to be busy with my class, thesis and assisting my supervisor. After the summer it is good to be back to a routine and the productive part of life.
I have Greek class four days a week, and there is a lot of work. But it is not really difficult but some of the stuff does take time to get the hang of it. I am enjoying it even if it is time consuming. I am trying to memorize the alphabet which is not difficult but remember the English equivalent is tricky since there are some cases where there are two letters in Greek to correspond to one English letter. Then there are some English letters that are not included in the Greek alphabet. This makes the translating fun since there can be more then one thing to correspond to a character, particularly when translating from Greek to English. I guess it is one of those things that will get easier with practice.
